Okay, yesterday i jz went to Klang to visit my grandma whu felt down and had to stay overnight in a hospital..I jz realise how my grandma has became so skinny and so weak..its kinda heartbreaking..last time my grandma used to walk a distance to play mahjong wif her kakis nearby jz like around 5-6 years ago..and now she have problems jz walking..so when my grandma was being discharge..me n my sis had a chance to see a jz born baby..so cute n so small..its such a big contrast..when one life is being born another jz diminish and fall into another cycle of life..a sharp contrast that a hospital holds each day..i m afraid of death i must say..but another ting that i m more afraid of is growing so old n so thin + helples that i cant even change tv channels cuz i have no strength to press on the buttons on the remote control..dats why now i m starting to stuff myself wif food..at least when i m old already i wud become those cute amahs that is more to the round side..i dun wana be skinny...i tink most ppl nowadays are weird...evybody wans to be skinny...i m asking Y??? when u r old alrdy will skinny do u good?..its better evybody start shoving food inside now to last ourselves till we are old..expecially for me i dun drink milk..so i needa eat alot of other foods to fill myself wif enuff nutriens to make me healthy enuff when i m old...I want to have energy when i get old..i tink of myself as a much long term person..i have made comparisons now alrdy on amahs dis days...i wud prefer to be one of the many cute n fat amahs..den skinny ones...n cute n fat amahs seems to have much more energy n r usually more optimistic towards life..( i reckon...cuz if u r likeable u wud be much confident)..n i wud smile always n play wif my grandchildrens...( if i have grandchildrens) n if by luck i have stored enuff carbohidrats inside me n have lots of energys i will be able to go around d world wif a tongkat or mayb wifout one...thats my dream..to go travelling when i grow older..n i want to stay at foreign countries...cuz it seems dat overseas amah are much more healthier...especially ang mous..mayb its because of the weather..i dun care if i m fat today( haha i tink i have stuffed myself wif lots of food dis hols..so happy)...wat i care is if i m skinny when i m old...i tink i still have room for ice creams..so now i m about to go eat my ice cream..live up my dreams of becuming a round chubby amah..

its just me.4:50 PM